The Artists’
Grief Deck

How-to

Welcome to the Artists’ Grief Deck. There is no correct way to use these cards, but we have these suggestions:

  • Set aside time for yourself to go through them
  • Find or make a space for yourself
  • Look closely at the images
  • Be open to the feelings that arise
Learn More

Take a Moment

Take a moment. It’s actually okay! I know it feels like you are in a fog. Or numb. Or lonely. Or maybe you feel everything’s a bit meaningless. I’m really sorry. It’s not easy. Right now I wan...

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Away with the Current

1. Take a small decorative box like a chocolates box or a gift box. 2. Make the box into a little altar to your loved one or group, put a candle in it and go to the beach. 3. Light the candle, put the...

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Time 2 Heal

In the Quaker practice of worship, friends come together, seated and facing one another, for an hour of silence. For the first few meetings, the silence can be uncomfortable. Maybe even unbearable. Fo...

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A painting of a young light brown skinned girl holding a large basket of corn. She has a dark red dress on and the background is a starry night.

Connecting With Ancestors

Connect with an ancestor, either by genealogy or culture or choice. It may help to imagine or conjure their image, or perhaps you may just feel their warmth or light. What might you thank them for? Wh...

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The Weight of Grief

Handling grief can feel like an immense weight is on our shoulders. A weight that leaves no room to breathe and is vast and lonely. It's important to remember that there will be moments when the weigh...

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The Bricklayer’s Dream

What do we do simply for beauty or love or joy? What do we do to enrich others? We spend so much of our lives shuttling ourselves from home to work and back again, sometimes losing sight of our humani...

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Hands

Go in front of the whitest wall in your house. Put your right cheek on the wall, it's like hearing the voice of the wall. Close your both eyes and think about baby hands- with all the details- chubby...

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An abstract painting oriented vertically that is made of vertical rectangular strokes of color. The lighter pastel oranges, pinks and greens at the top change to darker tones of greys, greens and blues at the bottom.

Waves of Grief

When a wave of grief strikes, fight the urge to run away. Remain on the shore and allow the wave to wash over you. Remind yourself that you won’t drown, and that the wave, like a tide, will go out a...

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Feeling Vulnerable

When grieving, it feels like you are walking around without skin, everything is extra sensitive. When the world feels too much I go to a quiet spot and escape into a book....

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Hold a Hand

Hold a hand, Hold the hand of your lost one, your beloved, the hand of the being who haunts you. And when you become accustomed to the deep presence of the absence hold any hand, your lover’s hand,...

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A painting of a portion of an empty bed against a dark black backround. Crumpled pillows and sheets rendered realistically in white and gray. Sheets and pillows indicate someone once slept there.

Is it Grief or Depression?

In the early days of grieving, some depressive symptoms are certainly present and normal. However, going forward, significant depression, exhibited in such ways as an inability to experience pleasure,...

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Hugs

Sometimes nobody else is around, or there's nobody to turn to for a hug. Maybe your person who died is the one who gave the best hugs, or even the only one who hugged you. Sometimes you just have to g...

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An abstract painting with large swaths of light and dark blues, white and gray.

Practice Strength-based Self-talk

Healthy thinking leads to healthy emotions. By listening to how you talk to yourself, you can determine whether your internal statements lead to anxiety and defeat (“I can’t do this") or encourage...

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When distressed, go meet your younger self

Reconnect with the childlike wonder within you. Wonder that made you feel alive. Think about at least two things that gave you immense joy as a child. Close your eyes and try to imbibe that feeling. S...

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A photograph with layered exposures of rocks and water. The colors are vivid blues, greens, yellows, and white on a dark background.

Revitalizing Water Ritual

You need: Water, a glass, calm energy, a moment of your time. Take a drinking vessel and fill it with water. Hold the vessel in your hands and concentrate. Say the names of your loved ones, spirit gui...

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Dance and Dream

Play a song that speaks to your heart and spirit. Dance and dream. Don't think just let it flood out....

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Piecing Things Together

When we go through a hard time, we sometimes feel like we're torn up into a lot of little pieces. To help feel more together, rip up some old magazines and glue the pieces together into a new picture....

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A print of a lush jungle river flowing to the left of the image. The colors are black, mint green and hot pink.

Letting Go

Visit a river or stream and bring a flower. Place the flower in the water. As you watch the flower drift downstream, keep your eye on it for as long as you can, keeping it in view until it becomes a t...

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A photograph, dramatically lit, in which a white woman's naked torso is seen cradling in her arms the body of a light brown and white owl, with its white-feathered wing extended downward.

Hold Yourself in Grief

Be gentle with your body through this loss. Find a safe and comfortable space to sit or lie down. Breathe. Name your grief out loud. Cry for as long as you need to. Place your hand on your heart and s...

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