The Artists’
Grief Deck

How-to

Welcome to the Artists’ Grief Deck. There is no correct way to use these cards, but we have these suggestions:

  • Set aside time for yourself to go through them
  • Find or make a space for yourself
  • Look closely at the images
  • Be open to the feelings that arise
Learn More
A painting of a Black man's head and shoulders in profile. He is surrounded by large white flowers, with a pink background and the words "Black-Skinned Beauty" in the white border at the bottom.

Helping Others Will Help Yourself

Helping others will help yourself.

Focusing on others can be a great way to enable healing.

Consider doing random acts of kindness: donating supplies to an animal shelter, delivering flowers to a nursing home...

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Allowing Grieving

Grieving is one of our most natural activities. Thich Nhat Hanh says, "When you plant lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don't blame the lettuce. You look for reasons it is not doing well. It may...

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Storytime

Read your favorite stories aloud and believe with all of your heart your loved one is listening closely to every page....

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A photograph of a young barefoot woman's legs with a garden of dead flowers in the foreground.

Holding Vigil

This image reenacts the final weeks of my mother's life, holding vigil in her room, surrounded by condolence flowers, waiting for death to relieve her pain. Having experienced the anticipatory grief o...

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I Wish

I wish......

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Re-membering

If a quality or idea someone’s brought to our lives lives on is us, a part of that someone survives, and in remembering what we’ve learned from them, we re-member ourselves: learn how and who to b...

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It’s Ok to Ask Questions

One question I have about death is… I wish I could ask the person who died…...

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Masking Your Feelings

We don’t always allow other people to see or know the way we are feeling on the inside. When we mask our feelings, sometimes the feelings get bigger or come out in ways that we can’t control or do...

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Naming Your Feelings

Think about the feelings inside you that bubble up. Try to give them each their own name. How many feelings can you name? Once you name them, can you let them go?...

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Combating the Finitude of the Grave

You find a deer mouse lifeless at your doorstep and bury it in the yard. Place your pencil on the page where you imagine the grave. Now begin to trace the contour of the mouse: the skeleton, the pulmo...

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Grief and Gifts

What were your loved one’s superpowers? In what special ways did they show up in your life or in the world? Imagine them in one of their best superhero moments, sharing their unique gifts for the be...

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Lost Time

Time is one thing we can never, ever get back. Having a chronic illness caused me to lose the experience of having a normal life by any stretch of the imagination from 2012-2016 and our current pandem...

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It’s Okay if You’re Angry

It’s okay if you’re angry. Angry at the person for dying. Angry at yourself for not saying the right thing. Angry at the doctors for not catching it sooner. Angry at friends for not understanding....

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A Simple Exercise

Pretend a newspaper reporter is interviewing you to learn about grief and loss and your job is to teach them. What would you want them to know about what it’s like to be you since your loved one die...

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Tell Your Story in Colors and Shapes

Tell your story in colours and shapes: Gather some paper and art supplies -- anything you like. How would you draw the story of your loss without using any identifiable images, just shapes and colours...

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Tell Your Story

When I am in my car alone, sometimes I’ll talk and explain life events that have happened to me like I’m being interviewed on a news channel or a talk show. I think about speaking it to the masses...

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A painting of a female face with dark hair, eyes closed, almost entirely obscured by rows of painted flowers in pink, red, and white which flow over the figure.

When Tears Won’t Come

My mother always said tears are cleansing for the soul. But sometimes the tears just won't come. Sit in a quiet place that can get wet. Wear something white. Put on music that calms you. Perhaps, ligh...

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Remembering

What are two things you learned from the person who died? Three ways I am like the person who died are… Three ways I am different from the person who died are…...

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A print that shows an off-kilter forest of dead trees that appears to be wounded and are oozing black goo. The sky behind them is a deep crimson with a golden sun.

Addressing Anxiety

Anxiety is a natural part of the grief experience. For some, however, it may become problematic, interfering with daily life. What things help to decrease your anxiety? Activities such as deep-breathi...

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