The Artists’
Grief Deck
How-to
Welcome to the Artists’ Grief Deck. There is no correct way to use these cards, but we have these suggestions:
- Set aside time for yourself to go through them
- Find or make a space for yourself
- Look closely at the images
- Be open to the feelings that arise
When someone dies
When someone dies, you can thank them for their life. Walk around the house, inside or outside. Find something that makes you think about the person who died. Really think about that person. Thank the...
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Ritual of Remembrance
I didn’t know I thought about my mom everyday until I had to wake up and remind myself that she was dead. Now, I wake up and remind myself she lived. Gather on a tray: Pen, paper, candle, lighter, a...
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Hugs
Sometimes nobody else is around, or there's nobody to turn to for a hug. Maybe your person who died is the one who gave the best hugs, or even the only one who hugged you. Sometimes you just have to g...
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Caring for Your Whole Person
We are integrated people, made up of our physical, mental, spiritual and social components. Good self-care involves all four components. Taking a walk, eating a well- balanced diet, resting well all c...
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Showing and Telling
Find something that you think your loved one would have loved and love it for them. It doesn’t have to be anything special or perfect. Maybe it is a simple object in your home, outside in nature, or...
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Holding Vigil
This image reenacts the final weeks of my mother's life, holding vigil in her room, surrounded by condolence flowers, waiting for death to relieve her pain. Having experienced the anticipatory grief o...
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Dear Future Ancestor / Nero Spiral
Meditation: "In the future the dead is all of us - jumped out of the earth to dance again. Every step a reminder of rhythm. Woven into our clothes gleam - dragonfly winged - I remember the good ghosts...
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Where do you feel most at home?
Where do you feel most at home? Try to remember the feeling of falling asleep in unguarded comfort, in complete connection with your surroundings. Losing someone can make you lose touch with yourself,...
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Blossoms from the Mourning/ Morning Series
The solace of nature welcomes you....
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Addressing Anxiety
Anxiety is a natural part of the grief experience. For some, however, it may become problematic, interfering with daily life. What things help to decrease your anxiety? Activities such as deep-breathi...
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Release the “Shoulds”
Our world has been in disarray from COVID-19 since March. If you’re like me and have a paper calendar, the following months look strange, empty, and not even representative of our own lives. Spend t...
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Six word Memoir
Everyone has a story to tell. Today, you have the chance to tell a part of your story in 6 words. There is no right or wrong way to do this. Take some quiet time in a peaceful space and think about wh...
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Allowing Grieving
Grieving is one of our most natural activities. Thich Nhat Hanh says, "When you plant lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don't blame the lettuce. You look for reasons it is not doing well. It may...
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Take a Cue From Poetry
Take a Cue From Poetry What is your favorite poem? Put it in your own words. In the original poem below, I substitute the word hope for grief from the first line of Emily Dickinson’s poem “‘Hope...
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Time 2 Heal
In the Quaker practice of worship, friends come together, seated and facing one another, for an hour of silence. For the first few meetings, the silence can be uncomfortable. Maybe even unbearable. Fo...
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Falling Apart
It’s okay to fall apart in the midst of rebuilding your life. Fill in the blanks: I have learned how to____ since my loss. I have overcome_____ since my loss. Now say it out loud while looking at yo...
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Are they still with me?
Acceptance – accepting that our loved one is physically gone and recognizing that this new reality is the permanent reality - is immensely difficult. While they may not be physically with us, they w...
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Waves of Grief
When a wave of grief strikes, fight the urge to run away. Remain on the shore and allow the wave to wash over you. Remind yourself that you won’t drown, and that the wave, like a tide, will go out a...
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Plant
After my mother died, I had the urge to plant something, to watch something grow. It felt good to sink my hands into the earth, feel the soil sift through my fingers. It felt tangible. Plant a tree, a...
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